Bleach blond locks,
Beauty to you is such a wild fantasy.
Whiskey and sleeping pills follow you from the night,
Into the back of your mind the next day.
It wasn't your fault,
He just called the cops first.
Jump town to escape the pain,
It's hard to believe that the victim can also be framed.
Together in the grey of light,
I reach for his fingers; wrapping my tiny hand around just one.
Heartbeat's fast; mine is ever so still.
We lock weary eyes, comfortable with the ominous chill.
Yet another doctor; knowing not what to do.
Collecting loose change to pay my own bills.
Rolling my eyes while nurses hook me up to more machines.
I want to scream.
Tell them to cut the poking and prodding me,
Because I'm through.
My visit to the pearly gates is long overdue.
My eyes are up here, but please don't look at the bruises.
Fade out, and hope for a better life next time around.
Sometimes you have to let yourself break into a million pieces..
So that you can put yourself back together again.
In cased by freedom; thinking anything is something you can do.
The smoke's not clearing,
It's just turning to tension thick as fog.
Maybe it's because you just stopped caring.
Sometimes in the process of helping everyone,
You need to learn to love yourself too.
As I shout out my fears; sixbillion insecurities,
No one is listening.
I should have known right from the start..
So, I'll just be saying nothing with all of my heart.
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